weird things that smell Really good

So I got into bed last night. It's been pretty cold at night still, but because it's hot in the day times they've turned off the heaters. So its freezing at night. Anyway, I was rather chilly so I got out my sleeping bag.

Seriously it smelt so good. Just the faint fragrance of wet tent, maybe a tiny bit of camp-fire smell. Who would have thought sleeping bag would be an appealing smell, but it is.

This led to interesting dinner time conversation, weird things that smell good?

Can you think of any? Does anyone else like the smell of sleeping bag?

Things I'd Rather Be Doing

1. Laying out on the beach
2. Going for a run, or a walk
3. Kayaking
4. Mountain Biking
5. Reading a book
6. Camping
7. Cooking
8. Playing the Piano
9. Swimming
10. Trying to Surf
11. Doing other assignments
12. Cleaning my room
13. Cleaning the Bathroom
14. Waxing my legs
15. Changing nappies at special school
16. Cleaning up Vomit
17. Vomiting myself

So there's not much I wouldn't rather be doing right now than my essay.
Time to suck it up and get back to it!

Dance Party Rm 213

I'm currently writing an essay on Euthanasia. It's very interesting, deeply confronting, and somewhat emotionally exausting. I admit to crying over more than a few youtube videos. Anyway. It's almost 11pm and I've been trying to work on it all day (I'm a bit of a procrastinator) I'm almost half way and falling asleep.

So it's time for an exercise break. A bit of iDance late at night (it is actually called that when you dance to the music of your iPod that no one else can hear, I'm not just tryin to make my uncool behaviour sound cool by putting an i infront of it, because we all know how bigger fail that is!)

For Example. iSnack 2.0 Love the taste, although that was the STUPIDEST name ever. Seriously?

" Just Dance, Gonna be Okay, Just Dance!"

Irrevocable Joy

I guess you could call it a phrase...

Irrevocable Joy. Irrevocably joyful. It Has been stuck in my head since yesterday. I don't think I've ever heard it said. I don't think I've ever heard the words paired together before. But they seem like soul mates. I don't know If it even makes sense to anyone but me.

Irrevocable Joy

I google defined both "Irrevocable" and  "Joy" trying to see if they really could go together and this is what I found.

Irrevocable- incapable of being retracted or revoked (wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn)
Joy- the emotion of great happiness

I think joy is more than that. And that is why I think they belong together.
I think joy is a state of mind. a decision. a gift.
I think it's independent of the circumstances and situation.
I think Joy comes from God.

And that's what I choose to be.
Irrevocably joyful.

When Googling joy, I found this thing that some person had written. Defining what she believes Christian Joy to be. It's really cool. I don't know who wrote it... so I hope they don't mind me stealing it!

"Joy when I wake up in the Morning and look forward to another day, just knowing that my life as I know it now, may end... but eternity is stretching out in front of me. I no longer fear death...

Joy at night, because I know that if I should die before I wake... God would indeed take my soul to be with him.

Joy in just knowing that I found the truth... I know that I know the God of all Heaven and Earth and he knows me...

Don't gamble on life
With all your luck and your skills
Cause ya can't play the cards
Ole man death's gonna deal
The bible has said
Who the loser's gonna be
There's only two winning hands
And they were nailed to a tree."

I guess knowing that someone cared that much, Knowing that I'm saved. Knowing that I have a hope and a future and a purpose. And this gives me Irrevocable Joy.

Photo: by the wonderful Leighton Kuchel :)

Irrevocable Joy.

Kisses & Disses

I decided to start up a kisses and disses tradition on my blog... kisses (generally!) being things that I like, and disses, being things that I don't like, and want to complain about (although I have been known to diss some people and complain about how they kiss, but yuck, I don't want to think about that right now!).

This weeks kisses:

1. I'm a marmite girl. Born and bread, but I really love this delicious spread. (I decided to rhyme to go with the whole cheesy theme).

2. This week it has been a full moon. I love it.

3. So Good Ice-Cream. Can I just say. It tastes GREAT and it's really really not that bad for you. It is as it says, guilt free (why are all my kisses about food?)

(As a side note, I'm also really liking indoor plants and charities doing awesome stuff like saving whales and raising money for clean drinking water in Malawi.)

4. "The Girl Effect" Emotive animated video telling how Girls can change the world. Amen Sister!

5. The hope of fun activities to come. To keep me going through all the dodgy assignments and exams. Visiting Ted in North Qld with Becky, Having Ted visit college, Beach camping with Michael Beddoes and Ted and anyone who wants to come (oh my goodness, Michael got his shout out ;-), Seeing Dana hopefully at Christmas!

 6. 4MyEarth Sandwich Wraps. So cool. Pretty expensive but a great investment, which I'll buy one day when I have an Income 

7. Seeing God answer prayers. I was worried about money this week. and prayed telling God. My boss text me a day later telling me that someone had quit and asked me if I could take her job, which is double the hours I was getting.

This Weeks Disses

1. Too many assignments, Not enough time.

2. Having no one to watch the full moon with

3. Cleaning Bathrooms. I'm so sick of it.

Well I think it is better to have more Kisses than Disses and I'm over it for now. So that is all.

Peace.

Junk Box.

It's not the healthiest of relationships.
Sometimes I want it too much. Other times, I keep a distance, refusing it completely.
Midde of the road is where I really struggle.
Just a little bit at a time. Some every day.
I suck at self control.
It's often all or nothing with me.
And I don't just mean junk food.

But this is my mission. Lately I've exercised like an athlete, ate like the nutrition major I'm meant to eat like and it's paid off. Now the really hard part. Maintainence. I decided I can start eating some junk again. Just not too much.

One Coles trip later with the girls and I have a whole shoe box of junk food. A couple of the things are from last Coles trip though. The mission, which should be easy, because there is a lot of junk, is to not eat anything unhealthy for the rest of the semester (4 weeks) that is not in my box. This means it has to last the whole time. This requires self-control. Something which I struggle with.

So I'm blogging about it. Trying to keep myself accountable.

If you get hungry and want an unhealthy snack. Come visit me.

Share the love, share the fat is what I say ;-)

Words I can't say.

I can't say these words.
I can't pronounce them, But really, I can't say them for far bigger reasons than that.

Ek mis die dae wanneer ons was vriende ...

I wish I could say it again,

wil jy my maaikie wees? 

But I can't.

Because any attempt at being friends again seems like more than that, and would defeat the purpose. So instead, I wont let myself. I'll miss being friends from a far. And post on a blog that you'll never read.

Give Me Your Eyes

Every wish you knew the real story? The story hidden, deep inside the hearts of people. The stories that they are too afraid to let others see. Ever wish you knew what they really felt? So that you could really help. Ever wish that you could take a glimpse through God's eyes?

This is my prayer.

The Girl Effect.

I heard a story about a university in England. The first university to allow women to attend. A guest lecturer was speaking that day, upon arriving he walked into the lecture hall only to discover, that for some unknown reason, all the men of the class were absent and that the room was full of women. He said,  

"As there is no one here. This lecture is cancelled." 

 Hearing this story made my blood boil! If I was there, I would have wanted to pick up my chair and peg it at him! Or maybe if I was feeling a little less violent and a bit more lady like, I would have been tempted to use his butt as a dart board, for my perfectly sharpened pencils, as he turned and walked away. But I probably would have been more submissive that I am now,  if I was raised in that culture and time. The scary part is that women are still treated as nothing. As worse than nothing in some countries. To be raped, abused, used for their bodies and rejected for their minds.

Another huge problem in third world countries is that people are starving, have bad health, poor life expectancy and no money. These things we can't in good conscience ignore, and we haven't. But the problem is, we've been going about it the wrong way. Check out the graph below.

This one shows, that if we increase the amount of people living in an area, by either giving them health treatments- increasing longevity, or helping them to have more viable healthy babies, what we're really doing is making them as a country more poor than before. Because we now have increased the population, so many more people are living in the same areas, with the same amount of 'wealth' just to be 'shared' between more people.

Seems rather hopeless doesn't it? But it's not! We've been making poorer nations more poor and more dependent on us, all because we didn't want to see them suffer. We can't ignore their suffering. So what can we do?

That's where The Girl Effect comes in. The solution to poverty is education. Particularly that of Girls. There are 50 MILLION twelve year old girls living in poverty. 

That is 50 million solutions.

If girls are educated there are so many positives that would come to both them and their nations.

1. the girls are stay in school safe from sex trades, helping prevent more cases of HIV.
2. the girls don't have children, who then would grow up to live in poverty and continue the cycle, this means there is less malnutrition.
3. the girls stay healthy.
4. the girls become women who can contribute to society, and reinvest more money into their families than the men do.

But that means they'd have to be used for their minds, and would become strong enough mentally to fight for their rights not to be abused. This means they need us to fight for them, because right now they can't fight for themselves.

The videos say it far better than I ever could. It Puts chills down my spine every time I watch it.

Now that, Is the power of a Girl. 

  

"Educate Girls. Change the World."

 
Here is another video if you want to have a look, the other two are the better ones though this one is still really good.

10x10 Messaging Video from The Documentary Group on Vimeo.
>

Love

I couldn't sleep. Just lay there for two hours thinking about the past, wondering about the future. Sometimes I feel like love is on my mind far too much. Sometimes I feel let down by love. By people I've loved, by people who I thought loved me, or just by the fact that I haven't found true love. Wow, 'cause that doesn't sound entirely cliché and corny and lame (Blame hormones, the older I get, the more amazed I am at the affect they have on my feelings!)

But wait, there's more!

I wrote this a while back when I was thinking about Love and trying to define "true love"...

"I like the idea that true love can't be beaten, broken, stolen, lost.

Nothing can get between it, nothing can ruin it.

At the end of the day, through it all,

True love prevails, always lasts, never fails."

But then I was thinking, wow, that's looking at love through a hugely innocent, romance tinted; kaleidoscope of rainbows now isn't it. But the best part is, though I may not have found "true love" [whatever that is!] To be blunt, some may think pessimistic, I don't think I believe that us humans are capable of True love. We can Love, but I think we are far too selfish, for True love. But with God all things are possible, so maybe we are if connected to the source of love.  If you re-read what I've written, with God in focus, you see that he's the one you are guaranteed to be Truly loved by. God is love. And that without meaning to, I've basically rewritten a few bible verses into one.

1 Corinthians 13:7-8 "It [Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, Love never fails."

Romans 8:38-39 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present not the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

There's a Chris Tomlin song that says- A lover for the lonely, this is our God.

Here is a pretty much unrelated song, but it is about love and I like it and it's my blog, so I'll post what I want to.

"Good love is on the way
I've been lonely but I know, I'll be ok
Good love is on the way"

Christmas Child

You've probably heard of this charity, but you should watch the video. If you can watch it without getting a tear or two in your eyes, you must be one tough beast.

I'm obsessed with Lyrics, give me a song with a catchy tune, or great beat and I'll listen to it on repeat for a week then hate it. Give me some great lyrics and I'll love it for a lifetime.

The song is beautifully moving. Hearing it sung by an 8 year old really helps you be able to see things from the point of view of the kids getting these boxes of gifts!

Cool charity check it out, only a couple weeks till boxes have to be collected, so get onto it if you're keen!

"The king will answer them, 'I can guarantee this truth: Whatever you did for one of my brothers or sisters, no matter how unimportant [they seemed], you did for me.'" Matthew 25:40 GOD'S WORD® Translation (©1995)

With This Ring...

Anyone who really knows me, knows how much I suck at making decisions! This used to bother me a lot. But after reading about my personality type I was comforted to discover that this weakness can be seen as a strength ["My greatest strength is also, my strongest weakness"?]  I see things from multiple angles. This means I'm really good at translating, helping people find a mutual ground, mediating, accommodating for other's feelings and being all-round-awesome at seeing things from every angle possible. Now for the extra annoying part. Seeing things from all angles makes decisions so much harder, I can see how if I chose that then this would happen, and they'd be affected this way, and then this and... or if I chose that, then...

Okay, So I'm getting to the point. Because I take forever to decide things, I sometimes start thinking about them, and working out what I do or don't like or what I would or wouldn't do, long before it ever matters. Now for a confession... I have a wedding folder on my computer, I'm not engaged and I don't  have a boyfriend. I don't even know a guy that I would want to be my boyfriend, let alone one day husband! I'm not the type of girl that sits and dreams about one day getting married, or who pines over the fact that I haven't met anyone. Occasionally I get lonely. But so does everyone. God's got it under control. So although the wedding folder may be interpreted the wrong way, It's there because I suck at making decisions! I don't purposely hunt out stuff to go in it, but if I happen to see something at a friends wedding that I like, or completely hate, it goes in there. The theory is, that I'm helping the future me with my future decisions!

Today I finally saw Tomorrow When the War Began. Best Book ever. We had to read it for my English class, I have read it about 5 times since then, including the rest of the series. [Side note, the movie was really good, not a let down at all!] So my brother, mum and I wandered out and walked past a Jewellers, I stopped to look at rings. "Ooh, I kinda like that one, but it's only worth $500 ha-ha. As if I'd get that one!" Mum said, "but what if he doesn't earn much money?" I thought my response was quite justified, after all I'm going to be wearing that ring for the rest of my life "Well,  I expect an engagement ring worth more than that, he can save up for it!"

I've thought about what kind of ring I want for the last couple years, every time a friend gets engaged, I check out their ring, and think, "Ew" [and of course, say, "Oh wow, that's so unique really suits you"] or occasionally, I think that I should get a photo of their ring off facebook and add it to my folder. I Kind of know what I want now: square cut diamond. Maybe channel set diamonds. Yellow Gold. No question there.

Tonight I discovered withthisring.org

It has challenged me and given me a reminder of how selfish I can be.

Selfish me wants a nice engagement ring.  But then my other side, sees how it affects everyone. The other side of me says to selfish me, "What are you doing? People don't have water to drink or food to eat. And you want your one day man to spend heaps of money on a chunk of metal with a sparkly rock stuck in it? Dug up by people who got paid almost nothing for their labour, but they dug in the heat anyway, just so that they could earn enough money to get a little bit of food, so that their children don't literally starve to death. And you call yourself a follower of Christ?

If Jesus asked the 'rich young man' in Mark 10:21 to sell all he had, give it to the poor and follow him, why would he ask anything less of me the "rich" young woman? I may not have any savings in the bank, or any possessions of real value, but compared to so many people I am rich. Luke 12:34 says, "For where you treasure is, there your heart will be also." 

I don't mean to guilt trip you, or myself.  I really don't have the answers. I only have the questions. But it's a start I guess.

How bout if it would save, 100 or even 1000 lives? How many lives is a piece of jewellery worth? Now that is a decision worth thinking about.

(Check out the website, it's really cool, there are some amazing stories on there, and some good solutions such as sending them your diamond and getting a fake one instead.)

Pocket Full of Sunshine

I couldn't sleep the other night. So I randomly started writing down what I love about each of my closest friends. I was overwhelmed with a pure joy after thinking about this.  I thank God that I met each of you. When things get bad, or when I forget where to look. You all are my pocket full of sunshine.

"I got a pocket,
Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a love and I know that its all mine

Do what you want,
But your never gonna break me,
Sticks and stone are never gonna shake me

Take me away (take me away)
A secret place (a secret place)
A sweet escape (a sweet escape)
Take me away (take me away)
Take me away (take me away)
To better days (to better days)
Take me away (take me away)
A hiding place (a hiding place)

I got a pocket,
Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a love and I know that its all mine"

Brittany- My kindred spirit. Best friend/soul mate. You are an amazing woman of God. You get me like no other and are one of the few people in the world that almost never annoys me! You say what I need to hear, not what I want to hear, and I'm okay with that, and appreciate it. Because I know you want what is best for me.

Ted- I love that (at the moment) you are the one guy in my life that I care about, but can still be totally authentically me around you.  I love your honesty. There is not a doubt in my mind when you compliment me, that it is true, not just to be nice, because you are so bluntly honest you always tell me the truth even when it isn't flattering! Your art moves me, and your internal world fascinates me. I'm glad that our friendship has lasted so long and that we let each other "see in" more these days.

Tammy- your spirit and smile lights up my life. The joy of Christ shines through you. Even though oceans and time have separated us temporarily, I look forward to the times when we can laugh together some more!

Stace- Your deep thoughts and brilliant sense of humour, your rawness and realness connects us, though our circumstances are different, i feel like we often respond the same way, so much so that it doesn't even matter if you go for the all blacks. I still love you anyway.

Kylie-Ann- my school friend, how much of life we went through together! All our talks and dramas. Boys and school. The crazy things we've done, the talks that could last forever, we always pick up where we left off, although we hadn't been separated at all! Though you're married now and you've returned to the land of the long white cloud, you always have a space in my heart (and also my country if you want to come back any time! :-)


Daniela- though you drive me insane at times, they say opposites attract, this is true, you pretty much complete me! Where I'm too logical, you're too emotional. Where I'm too scientific you're too artistic! Where I'm too phlegmatic, you're too choleric. Where I'm too shy you're too outgoing. We make up for each others weaknesses all the time, and have a heck of a lot of fun along the way. My life wouldn't be anywhere near as awesome without you in it!

Nicholas- I admire you for all you've been through, and all you're becoming. I'm proud of your effort. I'll always be loyal to you. I'll care about you on some level and pray for you and be here whenever you need a friend.

Esther- The most non-judgemental person I know. You know my most embarrassing moments. In more detail than anyone, because I know that you'd never judge, you'll shout it from the rooftops because you figure people should accept me just as I am, just as you do, and I love you for that. You're one of the most talented/dedicated musicians I know. Who else can play pop goes the weasel so well that I'll request it every time I see you playing your cello! 

Saia- Who achieves their life goal by age 23? You do that is who! Why, because you work hard. You push yourself and push yourself And I'm so proud of you for that! You're so much smarter than you think. You're funny and charismatic and will always have a bit of my heart.

Imogen- my most dedicated and hard working friend. I see how hard you work yourself, and how you push yourself to work even harder. You have immense talent, at everything you do in life! I'm a little jealous! I appreciate your intelligence and wisdom and all the genius-ly funny things you have to say and write! I'm so glad to have you still at college with me!

Monte- oceans separate us, and though we've only spent a small percentage of our lives literally together, I'm so grateful for it, also so glad that we remain in contact still, I think you are amazing and your friendship colours my life!

There's a whole heap more of you that I would love to write about, but I'm out of time for now. Next time when I cant sleep I'll write it down about you!

 "Count your blessings, name them one by one, count your blessings see what God has done"

"When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed, When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost, Count your many blessings, name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Count your blessings, name them one by one, Count your blessings, see what God hath done! Count your blessings, name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Are you ever burdened with a load of care? Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear? Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly, And you will keep singing as the days go by.

When you look at others with their lands and gold, Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold; Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.
 So, amid the conflict whether great or small, Do not be disheartened, God is over all; Count your many blessings, angels will attend, Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end"